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Country Discussion Topics
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A laugh for today
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Jimp Co.    Posted 05-26-2004 at 08:16:00       [Reply]  [No Email]

A white haired man walked into a jeweler's shop late one Friday, with a
beautiful young lady on his side.

"I'm looking for a special ring for my girlfriend," he said.

The jeweler looks through his stock, and takes out an outstanding ring
priced at $5,000.

"I don't think you understand ... I want something very unique," he said.

At that, the jeweler went and fetched his special stock from the safe.

"Here's one stunning ring at $40,000."

The girls' eyes sparkled, and the man said that he would take it.

"How are you paying?"

"I'll pay by check, but of course the bank would want to make sure that
everything is in order, so I'll write a check and you can phone the bank
tomorrow, then I'll fetch the ring on Monday."

Monday morning a very mad jeweler phones the man.

" You @#$%@#^^%$, you lied there's no money in that account."

"I know, but can you imagine what a fantastic weekend I had.

Texas    Posted 05-26-2004 at 08:25:16       [Reply]  [No Email]
I think I'll try that.................. :)

Clipper....Yo Texas....    Posted 05-26-2004 at 08:41:25       [Reply]  [No Email]
Let us know where the funeral parlor is....

Texas    Posted 05-26-2004 at 08:45:50       [Reply]  [No Email]
Yeah I figure if I tried that there would be enough slow walking and sad singing to pass for a New Orleans funeral :)

Ive also learned not to name cow dogs or cows after your favorite lady....seems they dont get the inference of endearment!

DD    Posted 05-26-2004 at 08:47:29       [Reply]  [No Email]
TeeHee, and I always thought that's why some folks called their cows Bossie! LOL! : )

Texas    Posted 05-26-2004 at 08:51:09       [Reply]  [No Email]
DD! :)))) Now see if I said that I would be accused of being chauvinistic! Damn this double standard!

~Lenore    Posted 05-26-2004 at 09:03:30       [Reply]  [No Email]
OK. Texas, clarify soemthing for me.
If a guy has a sweetheart and he says,
"Come here you little heifer."
Is that an insult or a term of endearment?

Melanie    Posted 05-26-2004 at 13:25:57       [Reply]  [No Email]
My mom used to say that when I was in trouble:
"C'mere, you little heifer!!!" I would laaaauuughhhh... and usually she'd crack up after a second too. :)

Texas    Posted 05-26-2004 at 09:06:18       [Reply]  [No Email]
Where I come from its a compliment...a heifer being a good looking thing. I guess it all boils down to where you were raised. Now if momma ever heard me call a woman a heifer there would be hell to pay. Disrespecful she would say.

DD    Posted 05-26-2004 at 08:59:23       [Reply]  [No Email]
I enjoy a good laugh as much as anybody. If we can't laugh at ourselves then we're all in pretty sad shape ; ) I was jest sayin I Myself would take it in the way you meant it. As an Endearment, but I do know some wimmens who wouldn't look at it that way ; )

Texas    Posted 05-26-2004 at 09:03:10       [Reply]  [No Email]
Trust me...some of these uppity city women Ive dated get mad as wet hens if you name a cow after em. They equate it to being fat and Im callin them a cow in a round about way.

What I want to tell them is its not callin them fat...its the parallel of feeding them for months before I get a return on my investment :P

DD    Posted 05-26-2004 at 09:20:41       [Reply]  [No Email]
There's yer problem, Uppity City Women ; )

DD    Posted 05-26-2004 at 09:17:09       [Reply]  [No Email]
Hey, I AM a BBW and if anybody doesn't like it then Pbbbfffttt!!! I never wanted to look like a zipper if I turned sideways and poked my tongue out ; ) And I agreed with your reply to Lenore, right up til the last line. But it still was funny : )

Yep....a good    Posted 05-26-2004 at 09:13:12       [Reply]  [No Email]
steak dinner never hurt anyone! LOL!!

Clipper: beef...its whats fer supper!

Texas    Posted 05-26-2004 at 10:15:35       [Reply]  [No Email]
I aint touchin that one Clipper...I could get in a whole mess of trouble :)

DD    Posted 05-26-2004 at 08:21:06       [Reply]  [No Email]
D'oh! What a Rascal! LOL!

Bruce    Posted 05-26-2004 at 10:08:55       [Reply]  [No Email]
I kinda like lookin at the phat gals myself.

DD    Posted 05-26-2004 at 13:09:14       [Reply]  [No Email]
Ya never know Bruce, they might be checkin you out too ; )

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