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Country Discussion Topics
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Where is a safe place for a single Mom to live...
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SingleMommy    Posted 04-08-2002 at 14:59:36       [Reply]  [No Email]
I don't want city but also need electric, phone, water, etc. Any ideas?

New SingleMommy

big fred    Posted 04-09-2002 at 07:14:49       [Reply]  [No Email]
I grew up in North Dakota, which probably has the lowest crime rate in the country. Last time I looked they had fairly low unemployment also, but that was about 2 years ago. Schools are pretty good, too, and high school graduation rates are some of the best in the country. It's cold in the winter, and if you need mountains and forests it isn't for you, but if you want open space, don't like crowds, and don't mind if your summer evening entertainment consists of the local Legion baseball game and a sundae at the Dairy Queen, it can't be beat.

DJ    Posted 04-09-2002 at 07:25:35       [Reply]  [No Email]
Well since we're giving info on locations of places to live..........

I'm near a corps of engineers lake and a wild life refuge area just south of Kansas City. It will never be built up thick with neighborhoods.

We have kind and friendly folks around here. I feel safe. The previous owner said that in the nine years she's lived here as a single women she never had so much as a garden tool taken. I can leave my doors unlocked etc. Everyone waves as we drive around, etc.

I've lived in many places from the east to the west coast and in Germany. This area is the best place of them all. The coasts are too dirty and crowded. The north is too cold and the south is too hot. We are in the bread basket/hub of the US. We have four distinct lovely seasons.

I can leave out of here for a vacation and get anywhere, in a reasonable amount of time because we are in the center of things. I can go to the rockies or the smokies, the Canada border or the gulf within a couple of days.

It's just right for me.

Women and children are welcomed and protected here as well. LOL

Dave in Mo    Posted 04-09-2002 at 09:04:05       [Reply]  [Send Email]
Yeah, that's right. If you don't like the weather, just wait 20 minutes!

Another Single Mommy - Dreamweaver    Posted 04-09-2002 at 06:23:16       [Reply]  [No Email]
Well, you're on the right track anyway. Country living is definitely the safest place to raise your children. I've had to move 3 times to get away from my ex, but that's a long story. I plan on heading up to Tennessee before long (gee, hope he's not a lurker on this board, lol), somewhere it is peaceful and quiet and not a lot of people. You've gotten some good advice. Sometimes fighting for "stuff" that can be replaced isn't worth it. I know. It takes a toll on your health, and you can't put a price on that. As far as the judicial system helping you get whats rightfully the childrens', I wouldn't put a lot of stock in that. If a man ain't man enough to do what's right by them without the law stepping in, he's probably slick enough to get around the law. I'm living proof of that nightmare. Good luck to you. If you're ever near Fuquay-Varina, NC, and need a place to stay for a while, you're more than welcome to stay with me.

DJ    Posted 04-09-2002 at 07:14:46       [Reply]  [No Email]
The law Is good to protect the children. But maybe NC is not the place to have children.

I was born in Lexington NC and as soon as I was old enough to leave that state, I was gone and would never live there again.

Still has the attitude that women and children are just chattel.


Salmoneye    Posted 04-09-2002 at 05:00:24       [Reply]  [Send Email]
Listen to LazyHorse and look at national crime rates and then move to Vermont...ok ok...or North Dakota...


Sammie    Posted 04-09-2002 at 09:43:06       [Reply]  [Send Email]
From a single mom who's kid is grown, I really value my neighbors - small collection of houses outside of a larger city but still room for privacy and to do what I want. The schools are good and the school bus stops right down the road. I don't think I moved far enough though, because the city is trying to swallow us up but there are lots of nice places to live in central Washington State. We have 4 seasons, not too harsh, don't get any major storms and are actually kind of protected by the cascade mountains. It's about 50 miles to the top of the pass, 25 miles to the dessert, Canada is close by, the ocean is "over there" and gardens grow great!! Just stay away from the cities!! I agree with checking the crime stats and I'd suggest getting to know your neighbors. Mine keep to themselves but stop by from time to time and always wave and say hi. They know when things don't look right and come and check on me. I've also gotten to know the local sherif (through my SAR class). I'm also saving for a rifle and safety class.

I'll though my hat in the ring. If you need a safe place to stay for a time and don't do drugs or drink alot, I have a small home and am remodeling but my door is open to you as well. e-mail me if you need to.

DeadCarp    Posted 04-08-2002 at 19:48:09       [Reply]  [No Email]
Find a place with a small population like 1000, get acquainted with the local cops so they know where you live and how many kids etc, then target practice with a good gun and keep a noisy dog handy. Doesn't have to be big - just a lite sleeper. With any luck, 99% of intruders will be critters. :)

DJ    Posted 04-08-2002 at 18:19:20       [Reply]  [No Email]
What's wrong with where you're at now?

SingleMommy- DJ here is the answer    Posted 04-09-2002 at 05:12:58       [Reply]  [No Email]
Because we have JUST split up I have to go somewhere as he is keeping the house. So I am looking for a place to live with my little angels.

Thanks for the advice everyone.

DJ Why do you have to leave?    Posted 04-09-2002 at 06:09:39       [Reply]  [Send Email]
Why don't you talk to an attorney to see if a judge will give you the home?

I wouldn't give details on the net but I can give advise here.

I must be a tough cookie, because I just wouldn't walk away and give it all to the other when children are involved and needs a home.

LazyHorse    Posted 04-08-2002 at 17:33:23       [Reply]  [Send Email]
Being a retired small town police officer I don't know that there truly is anywhere totaly safe to live, including security communities, buildings, etc. The best advice I can offer is to try and pick a particular area you are looking ot live in, then check the local police crime statistics which are all open public records. Also inquire as to the electric and phone companies average outages a year, etc. Like the other post said knowing how and when to use a firearm is also important, but you also have ot have the mental state of being willing to use deadly force if neccesary.
E-mail me at the above addy if you would like any additional advice.

Kraig WY    Posted 04-08-2002 at 17:32:35       [Reply]  [Send Email]
Bought this place 8 years ago when I retired. Nine mile from town. One mile from the highway. Since then I have never locked my door (I don't even know if I have keys to the house anymore). Go to the restruant in town and over half the trucks (and cars) are unlocked and keys in the ignition. Have a neighbor, single mom w/two boys. I know she don't locked her house either because I've hauled water for her several times whe she wasn't home. I had neighbors borrow my tools, tractors and such, even truck, while I wasn't home and I do the same. I haven't heard of a problem. Every one carries a gun of some sort in their vehicle but its for four legged varments. I've come home and found neighbors sitting at my table, eating cookies and drinking coffee waiting for me. If its dinner time and your in the area your expected to show up for dinner. I live in Wyoming (if you couldn't tell by the name) but there are places just like this all over the country.

PCC-AL    Posted 04-08-2002 at 17:55:19       [Reply]  [No Email]
Hi Kraig,
Your post reminds me of the way it was here back in the 50s and 60s when I was growing up. I didn't give a second thought to leaving my old car parked in town with the keys in it. Often drove to the next town 30 miles away and did the same think. Heck, my house has not ever had locks that worked until recently when I remodeled, but I don't depend on them now. Anyway, your place sounds like a great home of the past. Wish I could come visit, but would probably like it too much. Good luck.

kraig WY    Posted 04-08-2002 at 20:58:59       [Reply]  [No Email]
Like I said, my house is always open and if you show up and I'm not home poor yourself a cup of coffee, have a cookie and I'll be back directly. No body has ever been turned away from my house and I would enjoy the visit.

PCC-AL    Posted 04-08-2002 at 16:49:42       [Reply]  [No Email]
Hi S.M.,
It seems to me like the safe life of the future will be the so called "gated communities". I have more or less created my own as I live away from the nearest small community, but there is only one entrance. I have locked gates at it. Look around for something you can afford to either rent or buy that has some type of enclosure. It doesn't have to be entry proof, inconvenient seems to work well for average protection.
I STRONGLY RECOMMEND for everyone, especially women, to own and know how to use a firearm. Educate yourself about them and take a safety course, often offered by your local law enforcement agency. I am not a gun fanatic, but one in the hands of a reasonable, educated and trained person, male or female, is the best protection I know. To my way of thinking, guns and country living go together, kinda like syrup and biscuits. Good luck and I hope you find what you are looking for.

Marie    Posted 04-09-2002 at 03:57:52       [Reply]  [No Email]
Hi Single Mom. I am a single woman, and am somewhat in the same dilemma as you. I recently purchased a home in the middle of nowhere, I have a horse, so I needed country. There is no where anymore that is considered safe, a lock, gate, etc., only keeps an honest person out. I have had two incidents where someone has been prowling around my property. I was married to a Deputy Sheriff for 7 years, so I am educated in the use of a firearm, I am just not comfortable with them. Besides, if my gun is in the house, and the "bad guy" meets me outside, what good does the gun do? Or what happens if I accidentally shoot, or almost shoot, a friend or family member out of my fear? I have pondered this for almost a year, and on the advice of my Mom, have decided instead of buying a gun, to purchased several cans of pepper spray to keep on my key chain, in my truck, and two in each end of my house. Now, if the bad guy meets me anywhere, or if it's a friend or family member, I can disable them, without killing anyone, or feeling bad because it was someone I knew. One good kick to the groin, male or female, and I have the oppurtunity for escape. I also have two very large german shepherds to thwart any would-be prowlers, and they are VERY effective. Just my opinion, but thought it might help. I live in Ohio, and I do leave my doors unlocked, sometimes!

Sammie - syrup and biscuits ? LOL    Posted 04-08-2002 at 20:44:03       [Reply]  [No Email]
I can think of alot of things I might put on a biscuit but syrup isn't one of them!! But then, I like ranch dressing on scrambled eggs so......

Ira    Posted 04-09-2002 at 03:54:13       [Reply]  [Send Email]
Ah Sammie, You don't know what yer missin. Fresh maple syrup on biscuits fresh out of the oven with a dab of homemade butter.Can't be beat by the fanciest dessert made.

Mudcat49    Posted 04-09-2002 at 04:15:31       [Reply]  [No Email]
MAPLE SYRUP!!!!NO! NO! NO! Iffen you put syrup on a biscuit It's gotta be CANE SYRUP!!! YUM YUM !!!

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