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Country Discussion Topics
To add your comments to this topic, click on one of the 'Reply' links below.

You know your a redneck when ....
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Spence    Posted 04-11-2002 at 07:41:38       [Reply]  [No Email]

1. You take your dog for a walk and you both use the same tree.
2. You can entertain yourself for more than an hour with a fly swatter.
3. Your property has been mistaken for a recycling center.
4. Your boat has not left the driveway in 15 years.
5. You burn your yard rather than mow it.
6. You think the Nutcracker is something you did off the high dive.
7. The Salvation Army declines your mattress. (ouch!)
8. Your entire family sat around waiting for a call from the governor to spare a loved one. (ouch,again!)
9. You offer to give someone the shirt off your back and they don't want it.
10. You have the local taxidermist on speed dial.
11. You come back from the dump with more than you took. (Done that,been there !!!!)
12. You keep a can of Raid on the kitchen table. (Yup, that too)
13. Your wife can climb a tree faster than your cat. (...I'll stay clear of this one)
14. Your grandmother has "Ammo" on her Christmas list.
15. You've been kicked out of the zoo for heckling the monkeys.
16. You think a subdivision is part of a math problem.
17. You've bathed with flea and tick soap.
(Yup, shampooed with dog shampoo before the wife told me what it was for, then saw it had 1/2in left over and kept using it till empty)
18. You've been involved in a custody fight over a hunting dog.
19. Your kids take a siphon hose to show and tell.
20. You think a hot tub is a stolen indoor plumbing fixture.
21. You took a fishing pole to Sea World.
22. You go to the stock car races and don't need a program.
23. You know how many bales of hay your car will hold. (right on)
24. You have a rag for a gas cap. (that too)
25. Your father executes the "Pull my finger" trick during Christmas dinner. (low!!)
26.Your house doesn't have curtains but your truck does. (can't see anything wrong with that)
27. You wonder how service stations keep their restrooms so clean.
28. You can spit with out opening your mouth.
29. You consider your license plate personalized because your father made it. (close, real close!)
30. Your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand.
31. You sit on your roof at Christmas time hoping to fill your deer quota.
32. You have a complete set of salad bowls and they all say Cool Whip on the side.
33. The biggest city you've ever been to is Wal-Mart.
34. Your working TV sits on top of your non-working TV.
35. You thought the Unabomber was a wrestler.
36. You've used your ironing board as a buffet table.
37. You think a quarter horse is that ride in front of KMart.
38. Your neighbors think you're a detective because a cop always brings you home.
39. A tornado hits your neighborhood and does $10,000 worth of improvement.
40. You've used a toilet brush as a back scratcher.
41. You've asked the preacher "How's it hangin'?"
42. You missed 5th grade graduation because you had jury duty. (ouch!)
43. You think fast food is hitting a deer at 65 mph.


Redneck    Posted 04-12-2002 at 04:25:59       [Reply]  [No Email]
It's hard to be humble......


Whispering Pines    Posted 04-12-2002 at 00:37:08       [Reply]  [No Email]
Gotta add to #34. One shows the picture and one gives the sound.


Jim (Mi)    Posted 04-11-2002 at 08:14:51       [Reply]  [Send Email]
Good ones. Just went to his concert last month. Jeff is great. Last night I went to a b-day party for my brother-in-law. He got a garbage can from my sister as a gift. We were both drooling. We laughed and recited receiving a garbage can for a b-day, you must be a redneck.


Mudcat49    Posted 04-11-2002 at 12:39:53       [Reply]  [No Email]
Metal or plastic?


Jim (Mi)    Posted 04-12-2002 at 04:43:59       [Reply]  [Send Email]
Plastic, but you could put a whole family in this thing, and wheel them out.


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