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Country Discussion Topics
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#%* kid
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screaminhollow    Posted 08-17-2004 at 09:10:25       [Reply]  [No Email]
16 yr old stays in his room and watches TV. Wife and I have disagreements about his need to do chores,etc. Occasionally he takes it upon himself to actually do something helpful. He has busted the trans in two lawn tractors popping clutches. He has taken lawn tractors apart and broke the crap out of the pieces. Yesterday, he started my 8n tractor and tried to mow the pasture. I don't know what he hit, but he poked a hole in the radiator and then ran back to the barn, spewing hot antifreeze everywhere and it was nearly bone dry when he got back. Who knows if he fried the engine. My little three wheel farm truck started backfiring, so he used a hammer and open end wrench to pull out the spark plugs, bending up the cowling. Then he put in the first spark plugs he found, the ones for the Ford truck. Of course they were too long and the pistons were hitting the spark plugs. The cylinders are now full of metal shavings.

Oh for the days when children were property and you could beat the crap out of them if you wished. Well it is going to be another six months till he gets his license.

I have always told everyone at my house, "If it isn't yours, don't touch it." The lawn tractors and the tractor are not his, why would he decide suddenly to be helpful. I told him, I think the stereo, TV and computer all need some fixing. and took them out of his room. He protested that they were his. I said "yep!" He couldn't keep his hands off my stuff, It is time to see how he likes it. He can get em back when he gets his license and a job AND pays for the patching of the tractor radiator. My wife, who normally thinks I am too hard on the kids, was very silent.


johns48b    Posted 02-01-2007 at 19:40:43       [Reply]  [Send Email]
sounds like your daughter has learned the ways to push her brothers buttons to me. he's jealous of her and she knows it. don't give her a lot of praise in front of him and don't throw her up to him. i think you need to carry your son on a camping trip and stay out with him a few days and nights and build some trust up in him by doing somethings around the camp like building a fire and ask if he'd like to help. maybe not a camping trip but just doing anything that you can involve him in where its just you and him. don't tell him to do something to help you just ask if he'd like to help. put yourself in a jamb like trying to carry to much wood and ask him if he's hand you one more stick or would he hold this wrench for you while you get some heat and put on a stubborn nut. just think about ways to ask him to get involved. my 4 cents. things are higher now days.


Dominique Simard    Posted 07-25-2006 at 12:02:38       [Reply]  [Send Email]
I want to purchase a tractor cockshutt 1932 hart-parr to restaurate. I would like to get a ideas how much I will could sale the tracor after a good restauration?


henrich Iowa    Posted 08-17-2004 at 20:18:11       [Reply]  [Send Email]
Seems it may be time for a tour of the local county jail, the hospital and morgue. You may not be able to handle it but it will sure scare the hell out of your children.
My father use to say, the only tough guys he knew were either in jail or dead!
The children of today don't need to worry about anything, they have their music, a computer and plenty of spending money, even if they don't work. We all spoiled them, didn't take time from our lives to teach them what was right and wrong but let television do the job for us.
Look at the results. Most children can more than likely tell you who is on television tonite but don't know their relatives. Can find their way across the road without a map and can't read the map since they don't know north from their bottom side. Their eyes usually look one way and it is the wrong way.
Take time today to teach your children something valuable, and that doesn't include sitting on the rear. GWH


farmall    Posted 08-17-2004 at 19:04:32       [Reply]  [Send Email]

sure wish my kids could read your post and reply to it LOL.


KellyGa    Posted 08-17-2004 at 16:00:30       [Reply]  [No Email]
Well, I only have a nine year old daughter, so I am not even close to qualified to give an opinion. I hope that you can make him see that people work hard for what they have, and he should respect others property. Good luck to you and him, I hope you get through to him.


deadcarp    Posted 08-17-2004 at 15:06:49       [Reply]  [No Email]
I'm not saying your kid's on drugs, but unless you're lottery lucky, he WILL try them! Whatcha do is inform yourself so if trouble comes, you can see it.

There's a fella at the cafe who brags about how his kids have always been drug-free. And he's thankful for that. Well maybe HE has, but why are his son's teeth rotting? Why does he run full tilt for a whole day/night and then sleep like a rock the whole next say & night? Why's the kid going bald at age 30? Why can't the kid's wife stand still for a solid minute, talks fast and is pale as a ghost? BECAUSE THEY'RE ON METH FER GAWD'S SAKE!!! And the dad can't figure out where his nailguns & compressors are going! Well jeez, want the phone number of the drug dealer selling them cheap? Their only son is flunking everything in school, and the folks' remedy is -- he must need better pills! So it doesn't isolate itself to one generation, you have to ride herd on them all.

If us oldtimers will just do some homework, we'll be able to learn what everybody else already knows and get these kids some help. Learn ALL you can about every drug out there, and you have a running start cuz there's a wealth of it right here online. THEN team up with the cops & take action against every rumor out there. We are and they're on the run. We had 6 meth makers in jail last week. The couple left are scared to cook anything. And all these clowns are cowards - modern peaceniks -so don't worry about that. Another side benefit of meth - it makes them paranoid & melts their backbones. :)



Dave Smith    Posted 08-17-2004 at 14:05:12       [Reply]  [Send Email]
I may be a old man now but im glad I don't have to go through that again. Been there done that on all of these things posted. But take heart, they do some times learn. Now they tell me some of the bonner things thier kids are doing.HA, HA, HA, Woo Wee, I love it.
Dave <*)))><


Wylie Kyote    Posted 02-21-2007 at 00:56:47       [Reply]  [Send Email]
Some "kids" will do that to ya Regardless of how much you try to set 'em straight or how much love you bestow upon them. They seem to have more faith in what their friends say and do than the love they have for their Mom, Dad and other kinfolk. It sure is sad. Sorry I'm a couple years late with this, but thats my 2 cents.


toolman    Posted 08-17-2004 at 13:38:23       [Reply]  [No Email]
when i was just a kid about maybe 7 or 8 , my dad took me to town , bought me a second hand bike, doubled me over to the miners hall then told me to take the bike and head for home, well i did , couple of hours later he came home i had the bike upside down back wheel off all the insides of the axle pulled apart , he was quite upset with me told me to figure a way to get it back together if i ever wanted to ride it again, i did. all my life that lesson stuck with me, i used to borrow his tools until i lost a few or failed to put them back where i got them, then i was told no more, tools are expensive buy your own then you,ll appreciate them more , i did,im now a grown man with my own tools my dad is gone, i fix everything that needs fixing wheather i know how or not i learn , but the most important thing i learned was from my dad who took the time to see to it that i had to learn my way myself , for that im grateful, at the time i thought he was being hard and didn,t care, now i know differently, he was preparing me for a world where i would have to take care of myself and not to rely on others, because you can,t.thanks dad, i,ll never forget.


Dee in mid MO    Posted 08-17-2004 at 12:38:45       [Reply]  [No Email]
Heya - Sounds a little like he wants to be like his PA, doing things around the homestead, just doesn't know how to do them but thinks he can do it anyway with shortcuts. Are there any mechanic classes in your area he could take, even in the evening? I am sorry you are going through these growing pains. Many years ago, one of my brothers, at the ripe old age of 6, climbed up on Dad's big farm tractor and threw gravel into the tractor's fuel tank because he thought that's how pavement was made. I have never seen my Dad so beyond anger - it took him days to calm down to where he could even think normally. Take care of your blood pressure, sir. :~) Dee


farmer fred    Posted 08-17-2004 at 11:43:59       [Reply]  [No Email]
I have to wonder how he got to be 16 years old without having a better idea of how to handle stuff. Anyone can learn new things or how to do things better, but they have to have good teachers. A sharp kick in the a$$ won't help someone learn how to use a sparkplug wrench. Taking away someones telephone won't teach them how to drive. Maybe when he gets a job someone will teach him how to fry hamburgers, because it is unlikely he is going to have any idea how it is done until someone takes the time to show him. Kids don't just raise themselves you know, and obviously parenting is a skill some learn better than others.


screaminghollow    Posted 08-17-2004 at 12:27:01       [Reply]  [No Email]
UR so right of course. I am only the step dad. Problem is that whenever I try to show him anything, even since he was five, his dad doesn't do that, his dad doesn't buy stuff that breaks, if he doesn't like carrying out the trash, he'll go live with his dad; he spent a couple weeks with his dad and moved back with us. But the litany hasn't stopped. Why don't we have a plasma TV like his dad? why don't we have a brand new truck like his dad, why don't this and that? (I won't say anything derogatory about his dad but his 44 yr old dad, who never graduated from high school, lives in an apartment with his parents and never had to do anything for himself.)
I have tried to teach him about things mechanical, even bought him a go kart to work on and helped him rebuild the engine, taught him about different threads etc. I know full well he knows what a spark plug wrench is, where they are and how to use one. He just doesn't give a crap if the item is not his. He will blow up his bicycle tire hundreds of times and use the pressure guage to make sure it is right. Last month on his younger sister's bicycle, he just tried to put a 120 lbs in the tire and blew out both tires and tubes. Then he tried to say they must have been cheap tires or seconds. If I buy a half gallon of ice cream at the store on the way home from the office, I'll find the empty carton in the trash before supper. We have tried to teach him to be considerate of others and respectful of other's property. He is just like his revered "Dad"

Our 12 yr old daughter is completely the opposite. She will always ask if it is ok to have something or use something that is not hers. She will ask us to show her how to do things. She washes the dishes without being asked and always helps around the farm. She rarely asks for anything new and prides herself in making things herself. Last night realizing that it may cost a bit to repair the tractor, she said she really didn't need anything for back to school and her new shoes could wait. Thankfully, the money is not a consideration, but she offered. One kid is surprisingly sensitive and considerate and the other is a selfish brat.


Steve from TN    Posted 08-17-2004 at 13:49:32       [Reply]  [No Email]
It is very hard to raise another man's child,especially boys. I hope you make it. It sounds like you are trying. Sometimes, you feel like banging your head againt a brick wall. About as much get accomplished.


Indydirtfarmer    Posted 08-17-2004 at 10:47:44       [Reply]  [Send Email]
At some point, you'll begin to calm down, and maybe even start to feel sorry for what you have done. DON'T. It's in his best interest to lay down the law. My father was rough on me. I was a punk growing up. I tried to see just how far I could push people. He knew just how hard to push back. I never made him break. I finally quit trying. After being "busted" by him a few times, I begain to wise up.
My son, and his cousin are the same age. They went through a "phase" where they tried to do anything they weren't supposed to do. I put my foot down on my son. He wasn't going to be a criminal. His cousin didn't have that luxury. His father took off when Bobby was about 6 years old. His mother was a drug addict. He never knew what it was to be made to "grow up". He's in jail now. He got busted yesterday for trying to sell a generator he stole from his employer. He tried to sell it to me. His boss called me to find out if I knew where it was. I had to tell him. That's the right thing to do....For the owner of the generator AND the THIEF of the generator.
You have to pay the price for some things.......That's what makes you remember them. John


Peanut    Posted 08-17-2004 at 10:22:08       [Reply]  [No Email]
Lawn tractors ... well, they are easy to break. I know that well because my Crapsman is always in need of a new part or two.

Farm truck ... you are right. Tell him not to touch it because it is not his.

8N ... that is just a darn shame. As a proud owner of a top running 1940 9N I can feel your pain.

My 21 yr old only helps when I bust his chops enough where he feels guilty. Then whatever he does needs to be redone by me because it is always halfway right. Its not that I am that picky. Its just that when you mow the grass, you really have to mow all of it. Leaving a 6ft swipe along the edge of the fence just isn't doing the job. Oh well.


Wildman    Posted 08-17-2004 at 10:02:01       [Reply]  [No Email]
Durned if that doesn't sound familiar.Got a 17yr old who is a good kid but he and his friends could break an anvil with a rubber hammer.The kids call me wildman for some of the fits I throw about the way my shop is used and abused. I think it is just a teen thing and hope it will eventually go away. I am working and staying away from home during the week and dread going home. I get calls from him asking where is the battery charger. I tell him that there are 2 in the shop and look for one. He tells me that they can't find one and then I go into a rage asking how in the H__L he expects me to tell him where to find one when I'm a hundred miles from home and he is standing in the D__N shop. If I had four of my own I think I would beat on something with a hammer that was responsible for them,not their mother either..........


Freud    Posted 08-17-2004 at 09:55:58       [Reply]  [Send Email]
sounds like some anger/resentment issues going on here. You might want to look into a TC (Therapeutic Community) if it gets too much further out of hand. I'm in the Addictions Field, and see this every day. Good luck.


steve19438    Posted 08-17-2004 at 11:28:23       [Reply]  [Send Email]
no professional help needed here. all you have to do is to realize that teenage sons are the dumbest, stupidest, lazyist, foolish, lackadasical bunch of lovable rascals on earth. i was too although i'll never admit to it!


bill b va    Posted 08-17-2004 at 10:27:05       [Reply]  [No Email]

he needs the TA (TEAR up their A$$ method .


Kellyb    Posted 08-17-2004 at 09:40:13       [Reply]  [Send Email]
This is all scaring the crap out of me since I
have 4 boys soon to grow up!!! Yikes.. I have
learned that I have to do EVERYTHING hand on hand
with them.. things go a lot smoother that way!
whether it be baths/dressing or helping them fix
their bik


SusieQ    Posted 08-17-2004 at 09:26:34       [Reply]  [No Email]
In the first place, in 6 months, he might have his driver's license, but he wouldn't be driving anything of mine, you don't have to furnish him a vehicle, the old fashioned way.....get a job and save up the $$$$$.

And if he continues to destroy your tools, tractors, lawn mowers....check out the state facilities for kids that need about 4-6 weeks of a stay at a facility that deals with teens like this. Tuff Love, you bet.


Wisereader    Posted 08-17-2004 at 09:25:41       [Reply]  [No Email]
Sounds like he has an interest in things mechanical, but his aptitude is somewhere down with his attitude :-) Pretty common with the teenage disease. Like salmoneye, I would draw the line with my 8N. So far, my 15 year old has no desire to learn how to operate it (afraid I'll give him more work, but actually I cherish my seat time).

Sometimes parenting is not worth the money ;-)


steve19438    Posted 08-17-2004 at 09:22:38       [Reply]  [Send Email]
the last straw was my kid broke my portable CB radio. i took his cell phone and threw it against the wall! darn thing is made so good it didn't break!!!! i'm missing tools from my shed, the list goes on and on. thing is i was so afraid of ps'ing off my old man i never dreamed of touching his stuff.


Salmoneye    Posted 08-17-2004 at 09:18:45       [Reply]  [No Email]
And you can't 'apprentice' them out anymore either...

Sorry for all your broken toys...Especially the little pink Dorf...Quite partial to them myself...



thejdman01    Posted 01-23-2005 at 20:18:05       [Reply]  [Send Email]
boy if i was half bad as a kid as your sone was id have been killed i think i hated my dad for it at the time but now know he was doing it for me never abused but darn well knew waht a belt was. ill never forget one time i was about 7 and i was a big shot and i didnt need no help from no one and i didn twant to live in my parents house and it was so terrible and so this and that my dad went into my room and took my clothes and my things threw them in the ditch along the long driveay we had and said you dont like my house find your own. didnt take me long to realize the house wasnt so bad and i didnt have it too bad off. cant do that nowdays youd pry end up in jail.


Ron/PA    Posted 08-17-2004 at 09:13:34       [Reply]  [No Email]
Good for you, and your wife.
I'd be bouncing off the walls. You sure have alot more self controll than I have.
Ron


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