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Ya try to help -- :)
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DeadCarp    Posted 11-18-2002 at 10:23:59       [Reply]  [No Email]
Newt is kinda a salty old drunk, but there ain't a moment of his life that he can't explain, and i liked his latest one. He just got out of a dry-up rehab program in our local incarcetorium, and in fact was recently recognized as another in their long list of success stories.
So this morning he came to the cafe.
"Heard ya quit drinking, Newt - that's a surprise"
"Yeah well - and it's true too!"
"That rehab program really works huh?"
"Nope, they had nuthin to do with it - the dam liquor store convinced me to quit. Here i practically supported the place ever since the war, dragged in customers all those years, got as lewd as necessary to keep things interesting - how could a guy do more? And you know the thanks i got?"
"No - what?"
"The (expletive) barmaid had me and my lady friend throwed in jail, that's what! For 3 months we had to march down the hall and sit thru these blasted meetings and now we're supposed to attend some 12-step program and whatnot!----"
"That's quite an project-"
"Well I'll fix them - I'm not showing my face in that place ever again! I got a new girlfriend and we'll spend our disability money the VFW!"
"Uh huh."

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