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Running and Screaming Like a Girl
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Cindi    Posted 02-09-2003 at 06:28:38       [Reply]  [No Email]
It was a weekend and the kids were scattered about doing what kids do on the weekends. I was attending to important household activities that I couldn’t do with them in the house, like watching a movie all the way through and raiding the candy box. My husband was out working in the grove on the tractor and I decided to take him some iced tea. I loaded up a pitcher, grabbed a tall glass and off I went.

The rows run east and west, so I went to the end of one row and stood there listening, trying to hone in on where he was. I could hear the tractor coming but could not determine the direction the sound was coming from, so I stood stock still ears perked as the sound got louder and louder. I was afraid he’d get close enough to flag down but not see me, and I was not prepared to run after him in flip-flops and lugging a jug of tea.

All of a sudden, here comes the tractor running south to north, opposite of the way it’s supposed to be going, bouncing over micro-jets and water lines, doing about ten miles an hour. No husband.

I took off running in the direction the tractor was going to see what was gonna happen. Don't ask me why I didn't go the other way and look for my hubby. We’ve been married twenty years, I just somehow knew he was okay. About the time I took off, here came my husband running for all he was worth after the tractor. No matter how hard I looked at this scene I could not get it straight in my mind. Wasn’t he supposed to be in the seat?

He caught up to it and jumped back into the seat and regained control of the thing. As soon as he saw me coming he shut it down. I just looked at him with this what the heck are you doing face, and he tried his best to look like he knew. We kind of stared at each other as birds called to one another and a drop of condensation from the pitcher hit me on the toe.

“Well?” I said, shifting from one foot to the other.

Finally he grinned sheepishly and told me that he'd disturbed a nest of hornets that wanted the tractor more than he did so he let them have it. Now he was reclaiming it, thank you very much.

"Sure glad you weren't here to see me running and screaming like a girl." He said, grinning.

I on the other hand, had just been chased off the back porch the day before by a nest of angry yellow jackets. I made a complete fool of myself by screaming and running three laps around the yard trying to shake them, ‘running and screaming like a girl‘, I guess you’d say. Not that I was going to tell him that.

“That’s okay,” I say, “I probably would have done the same thing.”

Then I just smiled. It dawned on me that while we were both ‘running and screaming like girls‘, I didn’t get stung once and he got a dozen welts. One day when I’m feeling really generous I may give him lessons on how to really ‘run and scream like a girl’.

Stretch    Posted 02-09-2003 at 14:12:34       [Reply]  [No Email]
IT was bumblebees for me. I was "remodeling" our old chicken house into a horse barn/equipment shed/workshop. I had pulled the metal off some of the roof where I knew the wood was rotten from leaks. On the end I was working on I was removing part of the building, leaving half for an open shed. I was standing on the rafters about ten feet off the ground, actually on a double 2X10 header, cutting the rafters away with a chainsaw. Somewhere between the 2X10s was a nest of bumblebees. Apparently they didn't like me disturbing them with the chainsaw. They chased me back to the solid part of the roof. Musta been kinda funny watching a fat man in shorts(it was about 100 degrees) running along a 4" wide beam with a running chainsaw. Only one sting, no other injuries. Probably not an OSHA approved operation...

Cindi    Posted 02-09-2003 at 14:32:52       [Reply]  [No Email]
You musta missed your calling running along a beam like that and not falling off, sound like circus material to me!

Stretch    Posted 02-09-2003 at 16:00:48       [Reply]  [No Email]
You can do a lot of things with the right incentive. A nest of mad bumblebees is a lot of incentive...;o)

Ivey    Posted 02-09-2003 at 13:41:13       [Reply]  [No Email]
Thanks, Cindi. That was funny but all too true about the hornets and yellow jackets. I guess everybody with a tractor has done the yellow jacket dance, least once!

Fawteen - BTDT!    Posted 02-09-2003 at 07:30:36       [Reply]  [No Email]
I've got a little drainage ditch that runs slam through the middle of my property, right down beside the house. I keep the part from the road down to where it crosses my driveway trimmed back pretty good because it runs right through the middle of my lawn.

I was down in there with the weed whacker cleaning it out one time, and whacked into a nest of ground hornets. I don't recall much in the way of screaming, but I was doing some IMPRESSIVE running. I flang that weed whacker one way, and I ran the other. I swear, I made it 100 yards and hurdled a 4 foot fence before that whacker hit the ground...

Cindi    Posted 02-09-2003 at 08:48:21       [Reply]  [No Email]
FLANG! That is my word for the day! LOL! What a riot. BEFORE it hit the ground. You're a trip!

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