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I know I have to be very careful with this post...
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Cindi    Posted 02-10-2003 at 20:58:56       [Reply]  [No Email]
...due to the no cussin' guidelines, but I just had to share this. We cuss at our house, not a terrible horrible amount but, there is occasional cussin goin' on. You can not be the product of a construction worker, the daughter in law of a trucker and the wife of a roofer without some rough language insinuating itself into your vocabulary.

My oldest daughter is sixteen and over the course of the last year I have grudgingly given her permission to use two cuss words in moderation. Why? I dont know for sure, just a temporary lapse in judgement I guess. I didn't really expect her to have the nerve to use them. It kind of started out as a joke. Those words are a__ and h___. Both in the bible, in fact. To her credit I rarely ever hear her say them. Until the other day.

I was standing at the kitchen sink and I hear this runmbling sound. I look out the window and here comes Rocky the calf thundering past the window in the front yard. He does not belong there. My daughter had been the one out there last to feed and I say to her, you let the calf out, you need to go put him up.

Well first she argued with me for a half hour before she finally stomped her way to the door to go put the calf back where he belonged. I hear this muttered under her breath as she's walking away,

"Stupid ___ cow! I hope he goes to ____!"

(sound of phonograph needle being dragged across record)

There's no way to take this permission back. When dealing with teenagers after you allow something once, it's a done deal. I know that like me she is going to inherit a certain amount of this rough talk and take it with her when she goes. I have heard her use one word or the other on the rare occasion but never both in one sentence.

She's a good girl and gives me no trouble so I guess a little mild cussing is nothing to get excited about. But I suddenly miss the olden days when she used to say 'jack-butt' and to 'heck' with it.

Juliana    Posted 02-11-2003 at 20:01:37       [Reply]  [No Email]
Retired as a sgt. after 15 years in the state prison system. I DO think I've heard it all. And can those inmates swear!

Larry    Posted 02-11-2003 at 08:15:12       [Reply]  [Send Email]

Cussin'? You never heard cussin' unless you been around me. I bet there is a cloud of profanity still floating somewhere over lake Michigan from when I still had my boy's home. They could really try a mans patience. :-)

Okie-Dokie    Posted 02-11-2003 at 16:42:47       [Reply]  [No Email]
Don't want to sound judgemental, but some one should have told you that as the twig is bent so grows the tree. You are the one who, by your own actions, showed how parents are supposed to behave, and I guarantee, kids learn by example, not by what they are told.

Larry    Posted 02-11-2003 at 23:08:26       [Reply]  [Send Email]
My boys turned out to be the sweetest most even tempered men a person would like to meet. I figure they must have taken after their mother. :-)

Cindi    Posted 02-11-2003 at 18:31:40       [Reply]  [No Email]

Jim in Michigan    Posted 02-11-2003 at 06:47:33       [Reply]  [No Email]
I dont have any kids myself, but I have several nieces..4 of them ranging from 8-14,, well seesm their mother (my ex sister in law) allowed them to do and say whatever they wanted,, trust me,,A_ and H_ are nothing...ever here a 10 year old scream the F word at someone,,,its not pleasant,,, these girls were badly mistreated by their mom and her family, even s*xually abused,,So its hard to discipline them,,, I wouldnt worry about a 16 year old using the words she has,,,I am sure that by now she has learned a lot worse ones that she could have used,,,,Jim

Cindi    Posted 02-11-2003 at 06:50:57       [Reply]  [No Email]
If THAT word ever came out of one of my kids mouths we would have be engaged in a search for missing teeth after the dust settled. I know kids like that too.

Food for thought-    Posted 02-11-2003 at 06:31:51       [Reply]  [No Email]
"Cursing is the attempt of the feeble mind to express itself forcefully." Brigham Young

an heckfire, that man had 40 wives! holy moses I dont know how he did it. ship, I'd a cussed somewheres. you can bet your sweet asp on that. dam it all. Mike D.

Cindi    Posted 02-11-2003 at 06:49:21       [Reply]  [No Email]
I agree with Mr young to a degree, in matters of debate etc. But, I also know that there are certain situations where golly darn just doesn't apply. I cuss at myself and inatimate objects a lot more than I ever did other people.

Burrhead    Posted 02-11-2003 at 06:15:06       [Reply]  [No Email]
we raised 5 kiddoes here and then 1 nephew and 2 kids that were no kin at all.

My point is this:::: raising kids is alot like having a successful marriage.

You have to be tone deaf to certain vocal areas of the union in order to keep it going smooth.

If these type words are the only words the dotter has picked up and she is'nt in your face screaming them at you then don't sweat the small things.

I see 5 to 10 yr old kids ever day that use very explicit terms they have picked up from school and television.

Nobody usually likes to hear their own child using blackgar language but from my experience I would count my blessings that a child the age of yours is not using the hardcore terms.

You might try talking to the child when the 2 of you are doing something fun and both are having a good time. Just slip into a conversation with her and "GENTLY" tell her the language is troubling you.

Then don't harp at her or ride her back about it just set a good example.

Believe it or not she is gonna grow thru this stage too.

Cindi    Posted 02-11-2003 at 06:53:52       [Reply]  [No Email]
I have yet to hear her use these words when it wasn't mood/current situation appropriate.

Ana    Posted 02-11-2003 at 05:22:10       [Reply]  [No Email]
I pray to God that I never have to raise another teenager. My prayers go out to any of you doing so---it's the hardest, most thankless job. Myself, I got stuck as a kid with the word "sh--". Not a terrible word, but horrible in the wrong places. It kind of just slips out, but has been a major problem to me at times because I was an elementary school teacher. Had to rid myself of it. So cussing isn't too bad unless your daughter grows up to be something where cussing is a terrible thing. Then it's a hard habit to break.

Cindi    Posted 02-11-2003 at 07:00:47       [Reply]  [No Email]
Oh good grief, I wouldn't make it ten minutes in an elementary school setting. You know, now I think back on it, I don't remember my mom saying anything stronger than he** when I was a kid, but by the time we were all in our teens she expanded her blue words list to include the word you mentioned. She used to say 'hockey'. Did anyone else ever hear than one? "Oh, hockey!" I didn't know what she meant until she told me one day not to come in the house because I had 'dog hockey' on my shoe. Ohhhhh. Okay, now I got it. The thing about cussing is just about any word can be a cuss word with the right amount of vehemence behind it, or it might as well be.

Salmoneye    Posted 02-11-2003 at 02:29:57       [Reply]  [Send Email]

Our Daughter made it all the way to 4 maybe before she started cussing like a drunken sailor...

Now that she is in Kindergarten, she has a couple words even I don't know what they are...And I aint askin...

Cindi    Posted 02-11-2003 at 04:40:54       [Reply]  [No Email]
I remember saying my first curse word in front of my mother. I was fifteen and I called someone a dumb___. Naturally it was something I said all the time in front of my friends but you would have thought I had hit her with a dead fish. She went on for days and never let me forget that.

The last time I was about 23. I spilled a fresh, full cup of hot coffee in my lap and as I was quickly disrobing in the middle of the kitchen this stream of bad words came out. She laughed and said under the circumstances she probably would have done the same.

Appropriate cussing in front of my dad as long as it was minor, was never even remarked on. In other words, 'I cut my ____ hand on that stupid door!'....The reaction would be 'is it bad?'

I don't think I was cussing in kindergarten, though. lol!

Larry    Posted 02-11-2003 at 08:45:36       [Reply]  [Send Email]

My partents never to my knowlage ever cussed,and I'm not really sure where I picked up the habit.

I do remember the first time I let one slip out when I was about 10-12 years old. As usual,after supper my sister and I were trading punch's in the living room over what to watch on TV. When in a fit of frustration,because she was winning, I called her a dumb a__. Mom heard this and told me not to say that word again or she was going to wash my mouth out with soap. I'm sure she would have gotten to it right away if she wouldn't have been busy washing dish's at the time. Well things went along and after a while I let another one slip out. By this time Mom was done with those dish's and came running after me with a bar of soap. Mom had a really quick temper and wasn't going to put up with my cussin no longer,and I had no intention to taste any soap either,so the race was on. Our old house was one of those where all the rooms were conected. The living room was conected to the master bedroom,and that was conected to the bathroom,which led into the kitchen,and then back into the living room. When Mom came charging in with that bar of soap in her fist I jumped the couch and made for the bed room. I thought that by the time I got to the kitchen that I would be far enough in the lead that I could make my escape out the front door and be home free. But Mom stayed right on my heals. I probably would have made it the first time around,but the kitchen floor had a slight slope to it and it was a slick tile floor,so when I tried to make the corner in my stocking feet I nearly fell down,and would have be caught for sure. About the third time around,with my sister cheering Mom on and trying to trip me each time around I finally managed to get through the front door and outside to freedom. It was along time after that that I ever tried to use any cuss words in front of Mom.

Cindi    Posted 02-11-2003 at 11:19:23       [Reply]  [No Email]
What a cute story, see my daughter wouldn't have stopped at trying to trip my son, she would have tackled him. My mom never chased us, she figured we would forget to be on guard at some point and that's when she would nab us.

Pitch    Posted 02-11-2003 at 12:55:54       [Reply]  [No Email]
There was one time when I was about 14 I was arguing with Ma 'bout something and I accidently gave her the one finger salute. Unfortunatly for me she happened to be peelin potatos at the time and that paring knife came slammin across the base of my saluting finger. Thirty odd years later I still have a scar to remind me to treat my mother with respect.

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