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Country Discussion Topics
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Practical Jokes from outta the Past--always best!
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WallSal55    Posted 06-18-2003 at 09:17:53       [Reply]  [No Email]
When I was a kid, I remember the men moving the
unused outhouses to the end of somebody's lane
at night so they would awaken to a surprise!

Here's one my grandpa did on the farm. The gas
man from town was coming out to fill the tank for
the cars and tractors. When he arrived, they got to visiting. My grandpa said, "Ya know, all we
have to do is climb that fence, go over north,
crawl on our bellies to get to some melons. The neighbor has one heck of a watermelon patch. He's got the best watermelons around, and I've done it before. You could take some home with ya today!"
Well, they did! Many, many years later, my grandpa told the gas man that the fence, property, and watermelon patch was his! Here all
that time, the gas man thought they had stolen them.


Corey    Posted 06-19-2003 at 15:34:20       [Reply]  [No Email]
Them practical jokes sometimes backfire: One time I thought my wife was in the shower, so I slid in the bathroom door real quiet like. I then waited a couple a minutes to make sure I wasn't heard, then when I saw the shadow in the right place on the shower curtain I smacked her on the behind through the shower curtain and hollered, HYAAAAAH! The response I got wasn't at all expected,, My 20 year old step son hollered back, "you didn't scare no body." Got me pretty good though!


JanO    Posted 06-19-2003 at 15:06:30       [Reply]  [Send Email]
I, unfortunatly, can't think of things like this without getting caught.

My son, on the other hand, is a master. My daughter used to work a late shift part time, at a restraunt down the road. She'd get home about midnight, worn out and wanting nothing but her bed on a regular bases. My son had just gotten a life size plastic iguana for a science project he was working on.... I guess it was about 3 ft long and ugly as sin. It looked like a real live one....On the same night he got it, he put it in her bed, just below the pillow where she wouldn't see it immediately. She came home, tired, started to climb into bed one night and caught a glimps of it out of the corner of her eye and, not expecting to find a lizard in her bed, screamed like a banshee.

We all jumped up outta bed, ran into her room to see what was going on and she was dancing around on the other side of the room still screaming.
Didn't take us long to figure out what was going on when we noticed my son curled up on the floor in his door way laughing his head off. She still says she's going to get even for that one....although I doubt she could get him nearly as good.


Sid    Posted 06-18-2003 at 21:09:16       [Reply]  [No Email]
My oldest uncle had a knack for being the right place at the right time. One day he heard some locals teens plotting their out house raids for the night. and he was on the list. He goes home and moves the out house about four feet closer to the house.


we all know    Posted 06-18-2003 at 21:18:53       [Reply]  [No Email]
what they stepped in!!! thats pretty good.


Donna from Mo    Posted 06-18-2003 at 16:04:35       [Reply]  [No Email]
My mom and dad were "central", the local switchboard operators, in a tiny Missouri town; every Halloween our outhouse got tipped over. You could count on it! Thank the good Lord we had a porcelain chamber pot in the house for such an emergency, because there aren't many worse things than waking up in the morning with a full bladder, and finding the facilities can't be used!


Dave Smith    Posted 06-18-2003 at 15:12:47       [Reply]  [Send Email]
Years ago we were in a campground up in Canada. We had cut a small hole in a watermellon and inserted a bottle of vodka and let it drain into the mellon. Then we put it in a cooler with ice to chill it down for a treat around the camp fire for the adults after the kids were all in bed.
When we went to get the mellon it was gone. Some one had stolen it.
The next morning the owner of the camp ground asked us if we had given her young teen aged son drinks. We told her no
and someone had stolen a watermellon off us. We did not tell her it was spiked.
She said her son and his two buddies came home totally wiped out. They couldn't even stand up and were in bed moaning and groaning.
We found out who stole the mellon.
Dave


Highgrove    Posted 06-18-2003 at 13:33:53       [Reply]  [Send Email]
Talking 'bout stealing watermelons, A farmer in our area had a big watermelon patch and was a victim of unnamed persons snitching his melons. He put a big sign in the patch stating that one of the melons was poisoned. The next day added to the sign was, NOW THERE ARE TWO.


oh lordy,    Posted 06-18-2003 at 13:48:50       [Reply]  [No Email]
uncle joe had tomatos that grew 7 ft. tall. the biggest tomatos would get taken pretty regular like. he decided to add a bit more to the pulp. he took a syringe and shot one full of expectorant. his neighbor had a terrible cough about a day later. joe thought that might not be the sure way of proving his theory. he shot a few more of the large ones with a laxitive.

well, he sees this neighbor in town soon after and he asks him how he was getting along.
coughing real hard and spitting a lot, he told joe that he has had the sit downs some awful.

joe told him that he heard tomatos could do that to a person.

skinwhittler


WallSal55    Posted 06-19-2003 at 07:10:19       [Reply]  [No Email]
OMG, my mind never works like that. But, a h.s. babysitter racked up a $15.00 phone call to her
boyfriend while she was to be watching our kids.
I didn't know quite how to handle it, so I
sent her a bill, with a copy of the phone bill,
asked her to pay even if in payments. She did
send me $5. - but I guess I got my point across.
but not all my money.


DeadCarp    Posted 06-18-2003 at 10:20:27       [Reply]  [No Email]
On the subject of watermelons, they were so rare around here in those days, we had only one on the 4th of July. So my buddy & i had (bareback) ridden our horses over to visit my cousin, and on the way out their driveway, from horseback we spied all the nice watermelons growing amongst the corn. Well, we were out of sight of the house so naturally we gathered a nice one, and managed to cart the thing intact down the road a mile or so, and back off onto a woods trail. Oh we're gonna have our own private watermelon feast now! Busted it open and the darn thing was still green and kinda slick and tasteless, but we managed to eat some anyway. It had a decided cleansing effect so we both spent some extra time in the outhouse that night and the heck with those icky things. It wasn't til Fall i accidentally overheard my aunt
mention that she had made preserves from the nicest crop of citrons that year, they'd been planted right in with the corn. Once in awhile without uttering a word, a person's ignorance just smacks him right in the face, you know? Or sends him scurrying to the can -- :)




Cindi    Posted 06-18-2003 at 10:02:22       [Reply]  [No Email]
That's too funny. I hope I'm not that easily led astray if I ever get a taste for a watermelon. On a hot day they are definatley worth climbing and crawling for.


Cindi    Posted 06-18-2003 at 10:12:47       [Reply]  [No Email]
Here's a practical joke I pulled on my neighbor once. We are out in the middle of nowhere and she's this little bitty skittish thing anyway. One day my daughter Jill stayed home from school and Kris called, said...'watcha doin'....want to play some cards?'

I said sure, come on down. Then I hid Jill in the back bedroom.

When Kris got here, we sat down in the living room. I had pre-arranged with Jill to wait so many minutes and then make a noise, which she did, and I pretended not to hear it. Nobody was supposed to be in the house but me.

"What wazzat?" She asked, her eyes real big.

"I didn't hear anything." I said innocently.

Next noise was a big one, I couldn't play dumb that time so I got up and grabbed my broom and started down the hall with Kris stuck to my back like a squirrel monkey.

About halfway down the hall I said...

"Oh my God....!!"

I whipped around to turn and run, just to make it look good, expecting to run all over Kris but to my amazement she had zoomed down the hall, flew through the living room and was standing in the open front door, keys in her hand. I don't even know when she took off. I don't think you could have seen that movement with the naked eye! I laughed til I thought I would die.

She got even a few weeks later by giving one of the kids a fart machine. I'm going down the highway with a kid 'complaining' of a stomach ache and I hear this horrible farting going on. I literally pulled over to go back and check on this 'sick' kid while they all laughed their butts off at me.


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