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The Ranch Hand
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M.R.    Posted 10-14-2003 at 11:25:51       [Reply]  [No Email]
x-rated ;-}

A successful rancher died and left everything to his devoted wife.
She was a very good looking woman, and determined to keep the ranch, but knew very little about ranching, so she decided to place an ad in the newspaper for a ranch hand.

Two men applied for the job. One was gay and the other a drunk. She thought long and hard about it, and when no one else applied, she decided to hire the gay guy, figuring it would be safer to have him around the house than the drunk.

He proved to be a hard worker who put in long hours every day and knew a lot about ranching. For weeks, the two of them worked, and the ranch was doing very well.

Then one day, the rancher's widow said to the hired hand,
"You have done a really good job and the ranch looks great.
You should go into town and kick up your heels."

The hired hand readily agreed and went into town one Saturday night.

However, one o'clock came and he didn't return.

Two o'clock and no hired hand. He returned around two-thirty and found the rancher's widow sitting by the fireplace. She quietly called him over to her.

"Unbutton my blouse and take it off," she said.

Trembling, he did as she directed.

"Now take off my boots."

He did so, slowly.

"Now take off my socks."

He did.

"Now take off my skirt."

He did.

"Now take off my bra."

Again with trembling hands he did as he was told.

Now," she said, "take off my panties."

He slowly pulled them down and off.

Then she looked at him and said, "If you ever wear my clothes to town again, I'll fire you on the spot!"

Les...ROFLMAO!!!    Posted 10-14-2003 at 16:04:18       [Reply]  [No Email]
M.R., that was one of your best!

Vic in Kenefick    Posted 10-14-2003 at 12:39:26       [Reply]  [No Email]
> Subject: Pete
> > The farmer got in his pickup and drove several miles to his neighbor's
> > (a part time cattleman & antique furniture dealer) house and knocked
> > on the farmhouse door. A young boy, Billy, about 12, opened the door.
> >
> > "Is yer Pa home, Billy ?" the farmer asked. "No sir, he sure
> > ain't," the boy replied. "He went to town to do an antique fair."
> >
> > "Well," said the farmer. "Is yer Ma home?" "No, she ain't here
> > neither. She went to the fair with Pa."
> >
> > "Well, then, how about yer brother, Pete, is he here?"
> >
> > "No sir, he went with Pa and Ma."
> >
> > The farmer stood there for a few minutes, shifting from one foot to
> > the other, and mumbling to himself.
> >
> > "Is there anything I kin do fer ya ?" inquired the young boy politely.
> > "I know where all the tools are, if you want to borry one; or maybe I
> > could take a message fer Pa."
> >
> > "Well," said the farmer uncomfortably, "I really wanted to talk to
> > yer Pa. It's about your brother Pete getting my daughter, Pearly
> > Mae, pregnant."
> > The boy considered for a moment. "Yep, you would have to talk to Pa
> > about that," he finally conceded. "I know that Pa charges $50 for the
> > bull and $25 for the boar hog, but I really don't know how much he gets
> > for Pete."

Whew!    Posted 10-14-2003 at 11:36:42       [Reply]  [No Email]
I'm not sure if that one's gonna get you yelled at or not.There for a minute I was positive it would.


Rustybones    Posted 10-14-2003 at 15:28:54       [Reply]  [Send Email]
Yelled at by whom? I love these posts! Hee Hee!

Oh somebody surely....    Posted 10-14-2003 at 18:09:00       [Reply]  [No Email]
Don't ya know there's always somebody who comes along and yells about this stuff?


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