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Country Discussion Topics
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Home Remedies
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TO35    Posted 01-24-2004 at 16:47:35       [Reply]  [No Email]

1. If you are choking on an ice cube, don't panic. Simply pour a cup of boiling water down your throat and presto! The blockage will be almost instantly removed if the boiling water doesn't kill you.

2. Clumsy? Avoid cutting yourself while slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold them while you chop away.

3. Avoid arguments with the Mrs. about lifting the toilet seat by simply using the sink.

4. High blood pressure sufferers: simply cut yourself and bleed for a while,
thus reducing the pressure in your veins.

5. A mouse trap, placed on top of your alarm clock, will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep when you hit the snooze button.

6. If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives, then you will be afraid to cough.

7. Have a bad tooth ache? Hit your thumb with a hammer, then you will forget about the tooth ache.

AND..... Sometimes we just need to remember what The Rules of Life really are:
You need only two tools: WD-40 and duct tape. If it doesn't move and it should, use WD-40. If it moves and shouldn't, use the duct tape.

Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.

If you woke up breathing, congratulations! You have another chance!

And finally... Be really good to your family and friends. You never know when you are going to need them to empty your bedpan.

best wishes

KellyGa    Posted 01-25-2004 at 06:31:05       [Reply]  [No Email]
I liked that, lol.

Sid    Posted 01-24-2004 at 18:45:04       [Reply]  [No Email]
Shucks I thought you was gonna talk about castor oil, poke greens and that kinda stuff, and I was gonna tell you all about the benefits on vinegar and honey. Guess I'll just have to wait till some other time.

Dieselrider    Posted 01-24-2004 at 17:05:10       [Reply]  [No Email]
Those are words of sound wisdom. They rank right up ther with alwas drink upstream from the herd.
Or when leading the herd take time to look behind you every so often to make sure they are still folowing. Thanks TO.

Ron,Ar    Posted 01-24-2004 at 16:52:34       [Reply]  [No Email]
footnote to # 3, always try to do this AFTER the wife has prepared the meal, not before.

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