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Country Discussion Topics
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There are other ways to teach your child also
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Willy-N    Posted 01-26-2004 at 11:05:09       [Reply]  [No Email]
Reading the comments about spanking or as some would do beating your child to get across your point of view. I myself feel there are other ways to do it. I got swats in school and can remember when at least 2 of them were not my fault. One was when a kid hit me on the Bus and we both got swats but I had not hit him. Another time was when a teacher lied about me lighting a trash can on fire which I did not do. I have heard kids getting there spankings and some of them were way out of line and these kids grew up mean in our neiborhood. Child abuse is not a subject I approve of. There are ways you can deal with problems other then getting out a belt and whipping your child. I guess if you have raised them wrong that may be the only way you now can get your point across but does it realy work? I do not think it does or one spanking would be enough. I feel the reward and take back while a child is young will work and instiling good morals and talking with your child is better. If you wait till they are grown up to change them it may be to late. It starts off when they are cring in the store wanting something and you give it to them to shut them up because it is easier than dealing with it. After they are grown up and you have not solved these problems then don't complain you are reaping what you sow. There are times when they so not know how to talk yet that it may be nessasary to inflick a little pain to get them to understand "no" to protect them from harm or doing wrong, but if you get a handle on it right off the bat you won't have as many problems later. There are exceptions to these rules and some children don't have the mental apptitude to learn. Those can test you to the point of smacking them because they understand that, just watch out when they get big enought to smack you back cause you are teaching them this is how you get someone to do what you want. Mark H.


MrsHarrison    Posted 01-26-2004 at 17:16:18       [Reply]  [Send Email]
We have two boys and hardly ever have to spank them. When we do, we talk to them and make them tell us why they are getting spanked and also why what they did was wrong. This method seems to be real effective and they actually learn something. Like I said, we hardley ever have to spank them.


Willy-N    Posted 01-26-2004 at 17:34:36       [Reply]  [No Email]
If you read the post real close you will see that I said there are others ways of teaching your children. Spanking is not ruled out, just if you can do it other ways I feel they are right too. Proper punishment is a nessasary part of raising your child and each one is different. Myself I have found other ways and it did work for me. Just because the bible said spank the child I do not feel that is the only way for a child to learn or we would have to carry a belt around with us every time we wanted our children to learn something. I wonder if the bible realy ment that the only way to teach is using a rod or belt to do it? Mark H.


Gene SC    Posted 01-26-2004 at 18:28:17       [Reply]  [No Email]
NO! I dont believe that the bible meant that
using the "Rod " was the only form of dicipline.
It says to "Bring up the child in the way that it should go", That means through teaching,
discussions about right & wrong. in other words
showing the child how to get along with people'
doing what's right in business practices' telling
the truth. Things that make up a good moral
person, but use the "rod" when necessary to get
their attention.


Harrison    Posted 01-26-2004 at 19:07:49       [Reply]  [Send Email]
I did 1 tour military,buried all my grand-parents,and many other things I don't want to remember.But I have never to this date done anything that broke my heart as much as having to spank my children.It tears you up inside to inflict pain on the very ones you would give all to protect.However, as a parent you carry the responsibility for proper up-bringing and if you shy away for an "easier" way(Ridolin)then you have failed them and society.If it is something that can be talked about then talk,it is best.As a last resort use a spanking. P.S I got a problem with peple who dope up kids with ridolin to ease thier parenting job.There was no dope for kids in the old days and from what I have seen that generation had alot better morals.But then again they had real parents not dope pushers.


Willy-N    Posted 01-26-2004 at 21:24:27       [Reply]  [No Email]
A big part of our shool kids is on it now, even the teachers push it! Mark H.


Willy-N    Posted 01-26-2004 at 18:46:37       [Reply]  [No Email]
That sounds so much better than you have to use the rod as your only means. I hate getting in the middle of religion as I feel different in my beliving than some others do and that is a real touchy subject to some who are firmly decated to the excact word as wrote. Since I can't realy understand a lot of it unless it is re/wrote in plain english I have to depend on the person interptating it to say what it means. This is where I have the problems. Religion was used in many ways during the past to keep people from learning. Things are being up/dated or changed as needed to keep the church together. Mark H.


Terry    Posted 01-26-2004 at 14:51:35       [Reply]  [No Email]
well if you believe that the Bible is the inspired word of God, do you really think that you know more than God about the correct way to raise children? Just a thought. I got a few as I was coming up but not nearly as many as I probably needed. Anyway, my mother is gone but my Dad is almost 80 and if he felt that I needed a whipping today, I would stand for it. Also I would expect my 33 year old son to do the same. Its a matter of honoring your mother and father. Also in the book


Stan ETenn    Posted 01-26-2004 at 17:23:51       [Reply]  [Send Email]
All children don't respond to authority in the same way. Some are angels, some aren't. Too many parents today want to be friends or buddies with their children and so will not do what is necessary to help children grow and become an honorable and giving part of society. Some parents love themselves too much to decipline a child. The Bible says if you love your child you will decipline him. Each child will need individual types of (encouragement). Only a sick person wants to spank a child but sometimes it has to be done.


Willy-N    Posted 01-26-2004 at 17:46:12       [Reply]  [No Email]
Is decipline in the Bible meaning you spank or does it mean you teach them right from wrong? Is the only form of decipline the Bible talks about spanking with a Rod or is it just one form to be used if nesasary? That is my point and veiw on dicipline, has nothing to do with not raiseing you child to have good morals or respecting your word. If it works what is wrong with the method if the end resault is the same? Mark H.


Willy-N    Posted 01-26-2004 at 17:11:15       [Reply]  [No Email]
Mayby that is why that Church all got together and were spanking the children and told the courts to stay out of it? Sorry the way I look at it is I never needed to do it, so should I just spank my kids because the Bible said so? Mark H.


Gene SC    Posted 01-26-2004 at 12:03:11       [Reply]  [No Email]
I agree with you and these posts.I wasn't talking
about abuse. I'm talking about punishment
delievered AFTER thought and adminstered with
Love. (see my last post below) My dad was always
doing things with us kids, fishing,hunting,
family outings. he never hit us when he was
really mad and Always on the back-side


Willy-N    Posted 01-26-2004 at 12:09:21       [Reply]  [No Email]
I agree with you. There are times it may be needed but it must be done the right way. Abuse teaches abuse. A beating is just that a beating, not a learning process except to learn how to defend your self the next time. Mark H.


Gene SC    Posted 01-26-2004 at 12:47:00       [Reply]  [No Email]
I totally agree! my punishment ALWAYS came with
A good lecture first, most times i would have
took the "licks" and Skipped the lectures LOL.


Mark    Posted 01-26-2004 at 12:00:35       [Reply]  [No Email]
I say talk to them first time then the belt. Its the biblical way to do it


deadcarp    Posted 01-26-2004 at 11:37:02       [Reply]  [No Email]
besides there's nothing cuter than a 2-yr-old grandson who refuses to stand still for diapers and then when he gets cornered in frustration hands you the things and yells "that's IT!" but still has that "who? me?" expression. :)


Willy-N    Posted 01-26-2004 at 11:47:52       [Reply]  [No Email]
They are a lot smarter then most will give them creadit for when they are real young! Expressions can go a long ways in reading what your child is thinking or getting across what you are thinking. Spoiling your Grand Children is a way of getting back at your kids!! Mark H.


LH    Posted 01-26-2004 at 11:31:27       [Reply]  [No Email]
Mark I agree with you wholeheartedly. Sometimes talking with a child is just as efficient as corporal punishment. And when corporal punishment is used it has to be in moderation and not done in anger or it becomes abuse. Lord knows I got my backside busted plenty of times growing up and it didnt hurt me one bit, but there were times when a simple talkin to might have been just as effective had the point been communicated properly. About the only thing that I dont agree with is schools teaching our kids that its child abuse if their parents choose to spank them.


Willy-N    Posted 01-26-2004 at 11:44:37       [Reply]  [No Email]
The spanking my mother gave me were deserved. She had 4 kids to raise since my father died when we were young. She allways told me this will hurt me more then it will you. I remember having to wait a while before it happend because she said I want you to think about it first. She also said it gave her time to not be mad when she did it. What realy sets me off is when I see a parent hauling off and slapping there kid across there face in anger. I think this teaches meaness not punishment. It is showing your child you do not have the self control to do it properly. Kind of like sucker punching your child. This is not the right way. Mark H.


LH    Posted 01-26-2004 at 11:50:58       [Reply]  [No Email]
Yessir I couldnt agree more


Carrie    Posted 11-03-2005 at 10:18:15       [Reply]  [Send Email]
Sorry if i'm a bit off topic here but...

Now i'm not sure where you all live but i'm in Ontario, Canada. Over the past few years the youth crime rate has skyrocketed. This is very scary for myself since I am a single parent raising two boys, 14 and 11. The laws are way too lenient here. First offence - slap on the wrist and maybe probation. Second offence - slap on the wrist and probation. Third, Fourth, Fifth, etc.- ALL slaps on the wrist...and these kids know it!
If a child here goes to school and tells his/her teacher s/he has been spanked, it is law that the teacher must report this to the police and Children's Aid Society. The laws here have a very fine line. You cannot spank your child out of anger totally agreeable) and you cannot leave marks on the child. I don't disagree with this.
What angers me is that from day one in school the children are told that they are untouchable. Kids now know that they can get away with anything without consequence. Let me say that I don't need or want the right to spank my children. What we DO need is our rights back to instill FEAR OF CONSEQUENCE in our children. By them being told constantly that they cannot be touched in any way, they are giving our kids free rein to do as they wish without consequence. This is what angers me. My son once swore at me. I threated to backhand him (which i have never done). His response: You can't, I can call Children's Aid. My Response: TRY ME!!! He apologized.
Just so that I am being clear, I do believe that spanking can work for some children if done in a productive way. I do NOT agree that it should be part of a routine, or a first reaction.


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